Thursday, July 29, 2010

so here's the scoop.

I know you all have been just DYING TO KNOW why I haven't actually written a real, live post in like a hundred years.  And here's why:

I had a migraine.

It didn't start off as a migraine, well, maybe it did, ON FATHER'S DAY, when I had a Random Spontaneous Outbreak of Migraine that caused me to pretty much pass out at the kitchen table.  Well, not PASS OUT, pass out, just the sort of PUTTING MY HEAD DOWN ON THE TABLE AND INSTANTLY FALLING ASLEEP variety of passing out.  It was awesome.

Heh. Or not.

Eventually the migraine portion of the headache went away, and just the annoying headache portion of the headache remained.  And I am TOTALLY used to that nonsense, because I have a headache pretty much 29 out of 30 days a month, except February, and then I'm 28 for 28.  Unless it's a Leap Year and then I'm 29 for 29.

A statistical oddity. (name that flick)

Never mind.  The one I was thinking of was "geographical oddity".  So name *that* flick.

And then I got sick.  I'm not sure what sort of sick it was, but it involved a fever for days, and lots of gross boogers, and coughing and sneezing and sinus pressure and allergies.  And ear pain.  Lots of ear pain.  So after three weeks of that I went to the doctor, because it OBVIOUSLY wasn't one of those Standard Ten-Day Viruses That Could Be Waited Out.  And the doctor told me I didn't have strep (right, sore throat, too, and lost voice) and that I should go home.  So I did, but later in the weekend when I was feeling WORSE YET, I called her back to get The Drugs.

Which, for the first time in the history of EVER did not give me a yeast infection.  You're welcome.  I know you were dying to know that.  

Oh, and the boogers?  Were so bad that the buildup of crusties on the inside part of my nose piercing pulled the piercing INTO MY NOSE.  Because there was CLEARLY NOT ENOUGH CRAP IN MY NOSE.

Blah. Blah. Blah.

And then I had another migraine that lasted about 3-5 days, and was completely debilitating for at least 3 of those days.   I just can't even make fun of that.  I'm sorry.  I've tried and tried to find some sort of smart-assed thing to say about it and I just can't.  You'll have to be satisfied with the sarcastic remarks about boogers and yeast infections, because that's all I have, people.

So I got the migraine prescription medicine, and I took it because I seriously thought my brain was going to implode and I was going to leave my short people motherless.  I am not too worried about The Mister in that scenario, because he's lovely and charming and women are always falling all over him (although he will probably deny that because his momma done raised him right), and you can totally replace a wife, but a mama? Not so much replaceable.

Oh. My. Word.  I astound even myself sometimes.

I took the migraine meds even though they are contraindicated for both breastfeeding and my crazy pills.  And I did not go to the hospital when the doctor told me I should go to the hospital because I'm stupid stubborn, or because it's just too much work to find someone to come mind mah babehs at 10 p.m.

Anyway.  My head still hurts.  I need it to stop hurting.  Suggestions? Ideas? Cheap narcotics? 

What are you up to?

5 comments:

  1. ugh. that sounds just awful. i get migraines too, puking migraines, but mine have never lasted as long as you describe. i have to take excedrin, put an ice pack over my eyes and lock myself in a dark room for an undetermined amount of time while lying in the fetal position trying to fall asleep. (if i can actually get to sleep, it is usually the case that when i wake up the migraine part of the headache has gone away.) although i'm guessing you probably can't just lock yourself in a dark room - with having the short people and all. and i'm also guessing you've probably tried these things already. i'm so sorry :( i really hope it subsides soon.

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  2. Just like Obama said the other day, "I feel your Pain" but I actually mean it. Seriously, I really do. My migraines last for 3 days. Always, 3 days. I don't know why. Anyway, I take Zomig ZMT. It's a wonder drug and now I have the office women around me taking it too. We swap back and forth when we get low. It's like a legal Meth lab in the office. And like Andy/Kristen above, I get the puking kind. What's funny is that I just wrote about it two weeks ago.
    Hope that you feel better soon.
    Your Friend, m.

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  3. Hot pad around your neck. Coffee. And have your hubby rub your shoulders, neck, and head. What kind of meds did they give you? Sometimes the ibuprofen/tylenol rotated every 2 hours actually works. I didn't think it would until it was my only option with my headaches during pregnancy. (I know you're not supposed to have ibuprofen when preggers, but they let me in small quantities, because the headaches were so bad.)

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  4. sinus infection. hope you feel better because what you have totally sucks. also - thanks for clarifying the nose piercing thing because ellie is thinking about getting her nose pierced and was wondering about what happens when you get a bad cold and/or sinus infection and now? i can totally tell her.

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talk to me, people. because you know i get all giddy when you do.