Is it too late?

Is it too late y'all? Entirely, inappropriately too late? to say congratulations and I'm sorry and ooohhh and ahhh and send love due north and pine for a sweet little tini-tiny baby like that? Is it too late to say he's beautiful and perfect and how sweet the picture in my head is? See in my head this little bit was meticulously created and molded and crafted and then folded in to multiply the love and joy and happy chaos of the y'all's precious little/big family.. I'm so happy for y'all. If you could peek around the inappropriate length of time it took me to respond to the baby news - you would see how sincerely happy I am to hear about little Elliot. And that I love the name Elliot.

This brings me to my point. I think Jon and Pam can peek around that curtain of procrastination, because I believe they know me. See, since entering the world of Blog, I've found countless people that interest me..that intrigue me,..that fascinate me,..that entertain me..that shock me,..that make me laugh,..that make me cry..the list could go on. We're a regular parade of Dr. Seuss characters aren't we? We're all going different ways, we're searching, we're moaning, we're enlightening, we're analyzing, we're commenting, we're joking, we're advising, we're perverting, we're bitching, we're reacting, we're explaining. It's a sea of new and old, fast and slow, teaming with thought. We're a rainbow of voices all screaming and seducing one another, anyone who'll listen, hoping for someone to care.

And, it's too big for me. I feel lost in all that. I can't figure out how to hold onto myself in that overwhelming, overcrowded sea of voices. It threatens to swallow me up or, worse, freeze me out. It pressures me to identify myself, to lock in as one of the other, as this or that.

And then there's the Daytons. The Daytons who I relate to more than many of the physically present people in my life,. It seems like holding onto a unique identity is, ironically, difficult without finding others - somewhere - who think or feel or believe or live or vote somewhat like you. If not for geographical issues maybe we'd be lifelong friends, maybe we'd help each other and have inside jokes and maybe I'd show up at midnight needing a cup of coffee and girl talk..maybe we'd be the whisperers in the back of the pto meeting. It's warm, relatable, like-minded people like Jon and Pamela that remind me why I ventured into this crazy, bizarro world in the first place..it's a connection. A good one that just is - and doesn't pull you too far away from yourself.

Reading about your family make me feel good. I believe in the family, and in Grace and in marriage and in struggle and tears and in love. And Congratulations on the newest member of the Dayton Family.

that girl