emailing it in friday: dear jenny

dear jenny,

i apologize in advance for the lack of capital letters. my left shift key doesn't work and i'm too uncoordinated to use the right one.

four short people is a lot of short people. not too many, just a lot. and did kindergarten morph yours into materialistic little so-and-so's? because my daughter? materialistic. and also a little so-and-so. meh.

i took my team to the tattoo parlor last week when i got my nose pierced. elliott was in the sling when the nice lady crammed a cork up my nose and poked a sharp stick through it. oddly enough, it didn't really hurt, it just smarted and made my eyes water. in that moment, i was even more astounded by the supersensitive body parts people get pierced than i usually am.

but the weirdest thing of all was the excessive amount of taxidermied animals lining the ceiling. it was like somebody sat at the off ramp of noah's ark and picked off every other animal. there was one of everything. well, not an elephant. okay, maybe not one of *everything* but there were a ton of critters there. alright, not a *ton* either, but you get my point i'm sure. the kids liked the sample tattoos on the walls. wee man said, mama, why does that mermaid lady have stars instead of nipples? are they tattoos?

yep. something like that.

and in my defense, i had taken them to the zoo for the entire day before i took them to the tattoo parlor, and the trip to the tattoo parlor was much shorter than the visit to the zoo. so i'm really not a terrible mom, just one with questionable motivation some days.

let me know how you are. hopefully my shift key will be fixed soon so i can send you a proper email.

xo

pd