Friday, November 21, 2008

searching blogger

I KNOW that blogging about blogging is verboten, but hang in there for just another hour with me so I can get where I need to go here.

Looking at my stats is fun for me. For example, I wonder who is the person in Alden who reads me pretty much every day? Or how is it possible for there to be so many men who look to me for advice on how they ought to seduce their wives? Just because my husband and I had sex four times, okay, it was five, you got me there!, doesn't mean I know how men should seduce their wives already.

But today? I had a most unusual search turn up. Someone searched blogger for "birthday spanks images".

Classy. Real. Real. Classy.

I was looking at the Referrals part of my stat tracker, and clicked over to the corresponding number on the Details part of the stat tracker. And Details told me that the server my visitor came from was Yes, that is the real website.

Turns out is a toy wholesaler out of Brooklyn, NY. A lovely, child-related product company. And these are the guys whose pictures are on their website.

This is James.

This is Charles.

This is Richie.

Presumably, one of these gentlemen came across my blog, looking for pictures of Birthday Spanks, and found a picture of my daughter. It was not her birthday. And also? No spanking.

So there you go, Presumably Dirty Old Men From Brooklyn. Go eff yourselves. And not to a picture of my daughter. And should you come back here? You should feel comfort knowing that I am on the other side of the state. Warm, cozy comfort.

And supposing I am wrong about this? Apologies all around.

But even so, you ought to know better than to go snooping around a blog looking for Birthday Spanks.


  1. I hope there is a misunderstanding here . . . otherwise, this is sorta creepy . . .

  2. What a bunch of pervs. They even look kinda of skeevy.

  3. A kids toy shop, gross people, everyone boycot toy stores in Brooklyn!

  4. I applaud you. I just hope Birthday Spanks isn't some kind of new Nintendo DS game.

  5. OMG! So funny that you posted their pictures!
    That's hysterical!

  6. lol...

    i had someone happen upon my blog after searching 'parents spanked me'.

    um.. yeah. at least it wasn't about stroking mermaid breasts..

  7. maybe they were looking for something about the tradition of spanking one on his/her birthday? You know back in the olden days, one for every year of your age?

  8. Maybe they were looking for info on the tradition of birthday spanks, but seriously? They searched BLOGGER. They did not ask THE GOOGLES. Everyone who knows anything knows that THE GOOGLES have all the answers. Bloggers only *THINK* they have all the answers.

  9. I bet it was James. ;-)

  10. hey im the person from alden lol, i dont mean to come over as a creep or something but i worked a gig with jon at my school and found his blogs, which i find most amusing, and he sometimes refers to your blog so i thought i would check it out and you've got some good stuff.

  11. Hooray for Ryan!!!! Everybody say hi to my newest unstalker!!!!

    I find it interesting that you would mention being a creep in a comment of a post where I'm TOTALLY creep bashing. I love it!

    And I knew about you as a real person before I knew you were my stalker. From what I hear, you're MUCH safer than the Actual Stalker I had before I got married. And no, I'm not referring to the Mister, I'm referring to the Actual Freak My Shit OUT Stalker.

    Blog stalkers? Meh. I'm practically in love with them.

    Thanks for hanging out with us.

  12. man this is beyond creepy. way to throw them under the bus Pamela :)

  13. maybe they were looking for a pair of 'spanks' (the seamless panty/pantyhose things) for someone's birthday? maybe? Now you see why I've had so many disfunctional relationships huh? Where you see red flag..I see possibility.

  14. Also, my vote is for Richie..he's got that look in his eye.

  15. Where I see red flag, you see possibility?!?!!?

    You southerners are too stinkin' polite sometimes! Or kinky. Maybe too kinkily polite? Hmmmm.


talk to me, people. because you know i get all giddy when you do.