Friday, May 15, 2009


It's the Bloggy Prom Weekend, hosted by the lovely Jen from Blissfully Caffeinated and The Stiletto Mom from, uh, well, The Stiletto Mom.  I love obvious.  It keeps me from having to understand irony.

Today I'm turning the clock back fourteen years.

Excuse me for a minute whilst I have a heart attack and a stroke and count my grey hairs...

That was an awful minute for me just then.  And all of you older folks :cough:Stiletto:cough: just shut up and pat me on the back in an understanding fashion.

I went to the Junior/Senior Prom my senior year of high school with Seth.  It was the Junior/Senior prom because my high school was not large.  It was, and still is, very small.  In fact, the town where I grew up has more cows than people.  MANY MORE COWS.  And yet?  I've never been cow-tipping.  But I'd sure like to watch cow-tipping.

Seth was a very exciting boyfriend for a number of reasons.
  1. He was from another school district.
  2. He was a colossal flirt.
  3. He wanted to get in my pants.  Bad.  

I'll skip right to the end for you, so I don't keep you all waiting.  At my graduation party, Uncle IKnowThings, my oldest brother who is younger than me but remarkably everyone who meets him believes him to be much older than me (heehee), took Master Seth to the basement of our house and showed him the gun cabinet.  He told Master Seth to choose the gun he'd like to be shot with, if he ever showed up again, or touched me, or continued to see me.

At least that's the story that Uncle IKnowThings likes to tell, but somehow didn't relate the story to me until years later.  We were reminiscing, and I wondered why Seth seemed to drop off the face of the earth.  Uncle IKnowThings 'fessed up.

Anyway, here we are, in all of our resplendant prom-ish glory:

I am pretty sure it's the sun here,
but I recall he scowled quite a lot.
And because I was young and innocent,
I thought he was wicked hot.

It's pure poetry here.

The "Look At Us Being Super Fab Next To The Old-Timey Car" pose.
Except nobody said Old-Timey in 1995.
Or Super Fab.
Those were the days.

Because we were SENIORS
we traveled in style.
we were all such abominable drivers, 
our parents were happy to chip in for a limo.
We didn't even consume naughty beverages.
In the limo.

The requisite garter picture.
That's me in the middle.
I swear to the Almighty, I HAD to put
that thing a-waaaaayyyy up there.
The slit on my dress was high.
And I have a long torso.
Which that made the slit even higher than intended.
I was NOT allowed to be a whore in high school.
Also, I'm curious.
Is it just New York schools that have the prom garter thing?
Or do other places have this odd custom?

We went to a restaurant on Lake Ontario (far, far away) for a fancy dinner, and then rode in style back to our school to dance the night away.  Afterwards we went to a fantastic party at Jamie and TJ's house straight home to bed like good little children.  It was tons of fun.

Be sure to head over to Blissfully Caffeinated and The Stiletto Mom to check those hawt babes out.  If you want to join up with the Prom-A-Palooza Tour, leave a comment on either of their posts.

Check you later.  I've gotta go blast some Journey.


  1. Oh my gosh that is a riot! Love the hair dude! I totally forgot you had old lady hair. and your not kidding about our school being tiny! Yes they do the garter thing everywhere! Brian still has his girlfirends garter on the lamp in his bedroom at his parents house. (reminder: he's 32) Is that Amanda Strathern in the gold dress?

  2. Older folks??? Who are you calling older folk?

    Oh, me. And you are right so I won't kick your ass over that missy.

    I'm dying at the picture of you guys showing your garters (and we don't do that in Texas anyway but I've seen a lot of it today...), the guys are all like "whatever.."

    Loves it! Linking you up right now!!!

    PS: Thanks for hanging out with an old broad like me.

  3. I adore your old lady hair. Did you know I grew up in Rochester? I'm just suddenly realizing that you're a Buffalo gal. To think, I was a mere 60 minutes from your fabulousness!

    I love these shots!

  4. Ahhhhh.... the 90s. And you were in the BAND! I KNEW I loved you!

  5. Mama, you were a total babe. I mean, well, the hair is a bit old ladyish but that body, oh honey. No wonder your date was grabbing your ass. And he was cute. I would've let him have his way with me. But that's just me. I was a little slutty and we didn't have a gun cabinet.

    That gold dress your friend is wearing is fabulous. We didn't do the garter thing at my school. I'm kind of sad about that.

    Thanks for sharing, your pictures are awesome and you are linked!!!

  6. I loved your post! Looking at those hot pics of you was great! Of course I too am from Rochester and we did the garter wearing EVERY prom I went to! I may feel slight motivated to post my own crazy prom story! Funny Funny!

  7. Well Happy Belated Birthday to you! Your Promapalooza pictures are awesome! Seth was a cutie! :)

  8. Awesome pics! I love prom (not). I would never put my picture up. I'd rather be shot thanks.

    I've never heard of the garter thing before. But then again I am a west coast girl so maybe that's it.

  9. Great photos. I, of course, went straight home to bed after my prom, too.

  10. That gold dress IS the best prom dress, ever. I think it is a crying shame that we don't get to dress up like that as grown people. And wear tiaras, too. Because I love tiaras. Not that tiaras have anything to do with prom - they don't. But I love 'em. I went to the prom (where I am from we say "the" prom) in the '80's. We are talking massively puffy Princess Diana sleaves...

  11. It's making me crazy trying to find my picture of Senior Prom, but while doing that, I did run across the picture of my dad putting my garter on me. Maybe I'll have to use that one instead?

  12. Yeah, the garter thing is a mystery to me. Damn I wish I could find my prom pictures.

    You look great!

  13. My mom grew up in Rochester, she did the garter thing and my dad in buffalo did as well (well his prom date did) but when we moved to SC we didn't so maybe its a northern thing. I had an "Uncle IKnowThings" as well. Only mine was my grandmother's ex fiancee Jimmy who still hangs around and visits like a grandfather. (strange I know) But he pulled that number on Kensei, only it didn't work quite as well 9only lasted a few months.

  14. I don't think I was quite that harsh with poor Seth. Nonetheless, I think you could probably explain the disappearance of several of your other beaus in a similar fashion.

  15. You were such a babe. You had the figure I always wanted be didn't have.

    The garter thing was only for weddings in the Pacific Northwest.

  16. I had something else to say but the random dog threw me off. I love the pictures and you didn't have old lady hair. Maybe politician's wife hair?

  17. Let's just say that I am VERY happy that I have no existing prom photos. Some things are best left in obscurity, I think! ;-)

  18. And now a present, for your recently passed, we'll say 30th, birthday:

  19. Dude. Your dress?? Gorgeous.

    And no. In Californication we did not wear garters.

    That's just weird, man.

  20. I think you looked great and your photos don't seem like it was that long ago....let's see, I had two kids by then and had been teaching for two years.

    BUT. I think about prom now and it all seems just so silly.

    Is that because I'm jaded or old or both?

  21. I have to say - as far as embarrassing prom pictures go - you looked quite elegant.

    This is the first I've ever heard of prom garters. In fact, I just commented on another prom-a-palooza post asking "what's up with all of these garters??" So maybe it's regional.

  22. Love the pictures. You were smoking hot, no wonder Seth wanted you. Bad. So funny. And now I want to blast some Journey.

    Just a small town girl...

  23. I love your post. so entertaining!

    Loved the story about your brother too.

    I am tempted to get in on this prom posting thing, but I have to work through my embarrassment first!

  24. fabulous pictures! great post idea...everyone should do these!

  25. Hawt! Even with the granny hair. But the garter-thing? I thought that was only for weddings.


talk to me, people. because you know i get all giddy when you do.